


Of Men And Penguins

by Andian



Series: A Kind Of Magic [2]
Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Magic, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Stand Alone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-24
Updated: 2016-06-24
Packaged: 2018-07-17 23:14:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,047
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7289923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Andian/pseuds/Andian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There was the way normal people dealt with stress. And then there was whatever the hell Sidney did.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Men And Penguins

**Author's Note:**

> Part of a "Magic is real but we're still playing hockey"-verse, can however be read as a standalone.

Geno should have probably suspected something was up when he had made it into Sidney's hallway without being greeted by the man in question.

Sidney could be painfully correct when it came to greeting visitors at the door - slightly obsessive even - though Geno did harbor the small suspicion that it was probably partly to ensure that all guests took off their shoes before entering his house. Sidney insisted that shoes inside houses brought back luck and weakened protection wards. 

As a Russian Geno was inclined to agree with this to a point, though he did not think that the almost half a dozen protection spells Sidney had cast on his house before, during and after construction really cared much about inappropriate wearing of shoes. 

But today there was no Sidney to greet him with a small smile and a pointed look at his shoe. 

“Sid?” Geno called out, leaving his shoes next to Sidney's and making his way into the living room, empty expect for some newspaper and some book about the use of dragons during wartimes. “You here? I'm hungry, just came for food. If fridge is full, no need to come out.”

He was only greeted by more silence. Geno frowned. It was already half past ten. Not too late for normal people or hockey players who had just won their second Stanley Cup only a few weeks ago.

Late though for Sidney, who'd probably only wake up later than ten o'clock when hell froze over and the Maple Leafs won the Cup.

Geno's frown deepened as he made his way towards the kitchen. Even with his protection wards there was a concerningly long list of things that could happen, ranging from Sidney suddenly turning invisible to spacial or temporal displacement. Duper had once spent one afternoon in 16th century Spain and had come back smelling strongly like fish and mumbling something about chickens. 

The kitchen was also empty and Geno considered his options. Option most-likely was that Sidney had just gone out for a quick … something. He'd come back in ten minutes and then he'd laugh at Geno for freaking out and Geno would never hear the end of it. Paulie had once thought he had accidentally stepped on Nealer who had just gone to get some eggs and had come back to Paulie frantically searching the floor with a magnifying glass. Admittedly Nealer probably could shrink small enough to not be visible to the naked eye but at least as a Penguin he had always been in full control of his powers. Unlike some other people…

Deciding that either way it was best to cover all his bases before becoming the laughing stock of the locker room in the next season Geno pulled out his mobile phone. The call rang once, twice but Sidney didn’t pick up, not even after the fifth ring. 

Geno frowned. 

He might have just forgotten his phone, Geno reasoned. Or forgotten that they had made plans yesterday at the club for Geno to come over for breakfast. Unlikely considering Geno couldn't quite remember the last time he had breakfast at his own house and since Sidney had spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about the Canadian bacon he had wanted Geno to try, becoming more and more enthusiastic until half his drink had ended up over Flower's shirt. 

Well, maybe that was a clue right there. If Sidney really was such a lightweight that the three shockingly bright cocktails that had not ended on the clothes of his teammates actually made him oversleep then it would not be Geno who'd never hear the end of it. 

Still letting the phone ring on the off-chance that Sidney was really just out to run some errands Geno walked up the stairs to Sidney's bedroom. Silently he opened the door, wondering if he should have gotten a glass of cold water from the kitchen or if it would suffice to just poke Sidney's cheek until he woke up. 

There was no sleepy hockey captain snoring in his bed though. The room was messy in the usual way but something caught Geno's attention in the pile of clothes just beside the bed. It took him a moment to realize that there was a sound coming from beneath them. Coming closer he picked up one of them – Sidney's favorite lazy-day shirt, he realized - up. 

Underneath it was Sidney's mobile phone, showing Geno's call. Geno stared at it. Then he ended the call. Sidney's phone fell silent.

Turning his attention to the rest of Sidney's clothe he realized that it wasn't just Sidney's shirt lying in the pile. It was also his boxer shorts and the worn-out sweatpants Sidney would probably like to get married in if he could and then the short pants Geno recognized as Sidney's preferred sleeping clothes. 

Geno's frown, already rather extensive, deepened even more. A quick check confirmed that Sidney had hung up the clothes he had worn yesterday to the club. This left him coming home sober enough to put away his old clothes away and somehow losing his phone under a pile of other clothes.

Or the more logical conclusion, Sidney had gotten dressed and was just about to put away his sleeping clothes before something happened that let him to leave behind both his current clothes and his phone.

The situation was actually starting to become worrying. Maybe he should call the team witch. She was a nice woman and Geno would get to pet her cat while she'd try to figure out what the hell happened to Sidney.

The sound of something plashing in the bathroom stopped Geno trying to distract himself from his growing concerns with cute animals. 

The bathroom door wasn't fully closed, Geno noticed as turned towards it. It was open a bit and Geno stopped in front of it, wondering just how smart this was. Once again he wished he had some sort of sense-enhancing ability so he could look through walls or focus his hearing on one specific point. Those were one giant headache though to get through the NHL's regulations for player's magic abilities as Sidney never got tired of pointing out and therefore definitely not worth the trouble. Geno privately thought that Sidney just didn't want to admit that Giroux's glowing eyes kinda looked cool. 

Not that Geno didn't like his own powers but well, sometimes situations did call for something more ... hands-on. Or maybe less hands-on. The English language sucked and Geno still missed having twenty different ways of referring to magic. The Americans hadn't been very kind though to their more obvious magic users in the past and it showed in their language.

Geno realized that he was procrastinating opening the door. It couldn't be worse than that one time at Worlds with Semin and the fairy dust, he reasoned. Nothing could be worse than that.

So taking one deep breath, he pushed the door open. 

For a moment it seemed like the bathroom was just as empty as the rest of the house - and Geno was this close to getting seriously ticked off by this – then he noticed movements in the bathtub.

And then he noticed the flippers lazily splashing through the water. And then the white-black body attached to the flippers.

Geno stared at the penguin that did not have the modesty to at least stare back.

“Oh, Sid,” Geno then sighed. The penguin raised his head and made a happy-sounding squeaking noise when he spotted him. Water from the almost-overflowing tub slopped over and on the floor, drenching Geno's socks.

“Oh, Sid, really?!” 

With another sigh Geno went to the tub and turned off the water. The penguin made another squeaking sound, one Geno knew from experience was a mix between indignation and anger. 

“Hush,” Geno said to the penguin. “Be happy I got here before tub ran over. How did you even manage to turn it on?” 

The penguin in the meantime was trying his hardest to get out of the bathtub. He kept slipping back though, the tub too steep and slippery and the penguin too clumsy.

Geno watched. He really had been worried about Sidney. The worst magical attacks in hockey tended to happen after Cup Wins. Bitterness was a powerful base for the most toxic of magic and the results could turn out ugly.

So Geno allowed himself a minute of watching the penguin continuously trying and failing to escape from the bathtub.

Finally the penguin had either enough or was somehow able to sense Geno silently laughing at him since he stopped and stared at him. 

Geno managed ten seconds of being judged by something barely reaching to his hip before he shook his head and leaned forward to grab the penguin.

“Ugh, wet.” Geno whined as he lifted the penguin out of the tub. The penguin felt lighter than the last time they had done this but then it was the end of one of their longest seasons -thank god it was- and some weight loss was to be expected.

He put the penguin down who flapped his wings with as much dignity as he could muster after this.

Like always when Sidney was like this Geno felt the need to take a video or at least a picture to coo about later. 

“You done?” he asked Sidney instead. “Turning back now, want breakfast.” 

Geno would only admit it under the threat of suicide sprints but Sidney had actually managed to make him wonder about that Canadian bacon. Though frankly at this point he'd take overcooked eggs and soggy bread. 

Instead of exchanging feathers and wings for height and weight and everything else human Sidney had though, the penguin just stared at Geno.

Geno groaned. Then he took off his shirt because it seriously was drenched. Then he groaned again.

“Oh Sid, _really_?”

Sidney stared at the floor and just sadly flapped his wings.

It wasn't that Sidney couldn't shift when he wasn't completely stressed out of his mind. It was just that he usually only did it when he had come close to his breaking point. And then he got stuck until he had calmed down enough. Embarrassing and probably why Sidney was so paranoid about keeping his abilities a secret. And at the moment Geno's problem - once again - even though he had only wanted to...

Geno's train of thought was derailed by Sidney pulling on his trousers. Looking down Geno decided that they could deal with this after breakfast. 

“Come on then. Better have fish in fridge, not going out to get you some.” He would. Judging by the sound Sidney made and the way he managed to look smug even as a penguin, Sidney knew it too. 

The way down the stairs ended with Sidney now being completely dry and Geno cursing the fact that Sidney's pants were too short for him to borrow. 

“Why penguin, Sid?” he grumbled while staring at the contents of Sidney's fridge. Not nearly enough of that bacon for his liking. “Why not cat?” he continued berating Sidney, deciding that it was still enough to eat completely on his own should Sid not turn back in ten minutes. “Cat won't get wet, won't make me wet too.” 

There was a noise coming from the living room. Geno stopped his foray in the depths of Sidney's ice compartment and looked towards the door. 

Sidney waddled towards him, holding one of the newspapers from his coffee table in his beak. Geno picked it up when Sidney stopped in front of him, not surprised to see that it was their Cup win photo on the front page. 

Sidney made a loud noise and moved his head at the picture. Or probably their logo. Sidney usually kept his human thinking abilities when transformed even though his instincts could - and did at times - take over. It explained the make-shift pool in his bathroom but also what Sidney was trying to tell him.

“Okay, okay,” Geno said, putting the newspaper down. “Get it. Would be thrown out of Pittsburgh, media would have a breakdown, Flower would laugh at you .. ouch!”

Quickly he pulled his hand away from Sidney. 

“Bad, penguin, bad,” Geno grumbled staring at his finger. It looked okay considering what he had seen Sidney do to their medical stuff during his concussions. Though back then he had turned into a snapping turtle which was worse and showcased a whole bunch of issues Geno was avoiding thinking too closely about to this day. 

“What you do during Olympics though?” he asked turning back to the fridge. There was some salmon hidden behind a bag of peas. Geno stared at it suspiciously for a moment, trying to remember the last time Sidney mentioned having fish and then decided that he didn't care and Sidney would just have to deal. Penguin's stomachs were robust. At least Geno hoped that.

“You turn into beaver during Olympics?” He put the fish on the counter to let it defrost and then pulled out eggs and the bacon. Sidney actually stopped the excited noise he'd been making since he had seen the fish and stared at him thoughtfully, head slightly bent to his side.

Geno had to laugh. 

“Mascot for the team. Would be cute. Good PR.” Sidney immediately bristled at the notion of anybody outside the small circle of need-to-know and accidentally-finding-an-ice-bear-in-the-locker-room knowing about his transformations.

Geno just laughed louder and petted Sidney's head, careful to pull his hand back quickly out of the reach of Sidney's beak afterwards before starting on the bacon and the eggs. 

“Don't know, could help with morale. Worked for the German team this year.” Whatever joke the German player had been trying to pull on his teammates – and Greiss really hadn't been very forthcoming about the details – it had ended up with half the German team playing in an ever-changing coloration of black, red and gold instead of their normal skin colors. They got into the semifinals though unlike last year. Geno now was slightly worried about Sasha's suggestions for their next Team Russia participation.

“But don't worry, don't want to share anyway,” he said to Sidney. “Too cute like this.” 

Sidney ignored that and instead just flapped his wings, making another try at the fish. It was a good feet out of his reach though.

“Should have turned into bigger penguin.” Geno was not up-to-date with his penguin species but the last penguin Sidney had shifted into had been bigger. And the beak had been blacker. 

The bacon was sizzling in the pan in the meantime, smelling mouthwateringly delicious. Geno added some eggs and when both were done the fish had melted enough to give to Sidney who completely ignored him during the two minutes it took him to eat it.

Geno took more time with his breakfast. The bacon really was amazing. He made a mental note to tell Sidney that when he had turned back and to sound as smug as possible about it. 

After he had turned back...

His good mood, brought upon him thanks to a full stomach, suddenly turned sour. Now that breakfast was done his faint hope of Sidney changing back on his own quickly was slowly turning into concern. The longest Geno had ever seen Sidney changed was two hours. He couldn't be quite sure when exactly Sidney had shifted but he was sure they were getting at least close to the one-hour mark.

“You don't want to change or you can't change back?” he asked Sidney, leaning down to stroke his neck. Sidney made a delighted noise before waving his flippers twice.

“So can't then.” Geno translated. Sidney made a sound that could be interpreted as affirmative before pushing back at Geno's hand.

Well, Geno thought as he continued petting Sidney, this was at least a starting point. Mind you, not a very good one. It meant that something or someone had caused Sidney to get to the point where the world seemed so much easier to deal with when he wasn't a human. Or that somebody had cursed him.

The hand currently not petting his captain involuntary formed into a fist. 

There had been curse attempts in the past on Sidney. There had been many in fact. And with each Geno felt white-boiling anger and the desperate urge to protect Sidney. 

He stared at Sidney who, obviously unaware about Geno's inner turmoil, had started making happy cooing sounds at the petting, his eyes closed.

Geno felt himself relax. If it was a curse Sidney would have been more panicked. And it was the off-season. Hockey rule number one, if you had to turn into a child, grow wings or change bodies with somebody do it during off-season.

This left Sidney being stressed. Geno frowned. He couldn't think of anything that would have stressed Sidney that much, at least nothing Sidney had told him about. If they had lost against the Sharks in Game 7 … yes, then this would have been understandable. Right now though, it just made Geno wonder if there was something to this being a curse after all.

“It feels more calming, you know,” Sidney had once explained to Geno. “Like I'm still here but sort of away from everything? It still matters but less. Most of the time I'm not even really worried about not being able to change back.”

Back then Geno had considered this to be something good, Sidney having the opportunity to just switch off for a bit, turning back after a few hours. Right now though he realized that Sidney probably wouldn't also really care if him shifting was even less voluntary than usual.

Geno went through a mental list of people who could help him figure this out. Number one was naturally anybody from the magic support staff but the only two people left during the off-season were currently trying to help Beau who hadn't stopped glowing since they had won the cup. Never let it be said that hockey players were original when it came to nicknames, Geno thought dryly.

He would call them naturally should this stick longer but in the meantime he'd let them try to help Beau who had complained to Geno yesterday that he was getting sick of having to sleep with sunglasses.

The list of possible helpful people thinned out considerably after omitting the team witches and wizards. 

“Want me to call Kessel?” Geno asked. Kessel didn't know about Sidney's power but Geno figured he could keep quiet and from everybody else in the team he also had abilities that came closest to Sidney's. 

Sort of. But Geno figured penguins or hockey equipment, it was pretty much the same in the end. There had been some jokes in the locker room if it was against NHL rules to play with a puck that was actually a hockey player. 

Knowing the NHL it probably was. With a shudder Geno thought back to last season and the nightmare that his little “horny” situation had been when it came to paperwork he had to fill out.

“Kessel could maybe help.” Geno continued though from the way Sidney just stared at him he really wasn't a fan of the idea.

“Okay, okay, I won't call Kessel,” Geno muttered, deciding it was not worth getting bitten again.

“Murray maybe?” he rolled his eyes when Sidney didn't even blink. Admittedly Geno was grasping for straws here. Murray was the only witch on the team, but his magical abilities were indirectly proportional to his goalkeeping ones. And he also reacted rather lackluster every time somebody asked him to perform magic. Canadians and magic, Geno thought, inwardly rolling his eyes. Why couldn't there be some more Swedes on team? Or any Europeans really. Hell, he'd take a five-minute comeback from Jágr, even though half the league thought he was actually a vampire while the other half was convinced his magic required virginal sacrifices. 

“Flower then?” Talking to plants – and really, hockey players and nicknames – was probably even less helpful than Geno's own abilities - which didn't work on animals – but he was usually able to calm down Sidney enough to trigger a shift back into human form.

Sidney let out a deafening noise, making Geno flinch.

“No Flower, okay.” Geno grumbled. “Just going to stay here until you turn back then.”

 

With an angry sound he stood up and walked the few meters to the couch.

Sidney followed him after a few moments and Geno suppressed another sigh.

“Don't worry,” he mumbled, more to himself then to Sidney. “Going to figure this out.”

For the time being though he switched on the television and started petting Sidney again. 

It wasn't that much different from their usual routine. Less petting normally though. Not that Geno would mind... 

He stopped himself. Tried to focus on the television instead, turned to some nature documentary about haunted houses. Geno let the narration blabbing about their importance for balanced ecosystems wash over him. He wondered if he could find something about penguins but decided it was not worth dealing with his own penguin throwing a temper tantrum. 

He felt himself nodding off after twenty minutes, Sidney, having somehow managed to get on the couch and leaning against him, being mercifully silent. When Geno forced his eyes open again, the documentary had given way to some cooking show and Sidney was still a penguin.

Geno felt something cold gripping his heart. A lock at the clock confirmed that they were now far over Sidney's longest shift and all the memories of every team-seminar about curses Geno ever had to attend suddenly came back in an instant, hitting him with full force.

He bent down, burying his hand in Sidney's feathers once more, desperate to distract himself somehow. 

“So Sid, what … what are plans?” Geno asked. He wondered if his voice sounded as tense as he felt. For Sidney’s sake he hoped it didn’t. “Going back to Canada for a while, yes?” He actually had wanted to talk with Sidney about this today. It was the kind of talk though that required more than one active participant. And less feathers.

“And vacation, earned it,” Geno continued. There was movement and then Sidney slipped out of his grip and shambled out of the living room.

Geno stared after him, panic momentarily completely drowned out by confusion and then stood up from the couch to follow him. Sidney had made it to the stairs and now was very determinedly trying to climb them. Geno watched him in silence for a moment before reaching for him. 

Sidney made an angry noise and swatted at him with his wings. Geno quickly stepped away.

 

“Okay then, do on your own,” Geno said. With crossed arms and wondering if this was a sign of the curse taking hold he watched as Sidney slowly climbed the stairs until he had finally reached the top. He rested there for a moment before making his way into his bedroom.

For a brief moment Geno considered going back into the living room and just letting Sidney sulk on his own. Then he remembered the time Sidney had shifted in the equipment room and gotten stuck in the torn net of a goal and with a sigh he followed him up the stairs. 

A vague feeling of déjà vu came over Geno when he entered Sidney's bedroom to the sound of water plashing coming from the bathroom. Sidney was back in the tub, paddling around.

Geno sat down next to the tub and just watched him.

“Sure you just don't want to change back?” he asked after a while. Sidney splashed some water him, something Geno stoically endured since he was still not wearing his shirt.

“If it's a curse, have to tell somebody at some point,” Geno continued. He was only trying to be reasonable here. Sidney dove under water. The tub wasn't very deep so he reemerged after a few seconds.

Geno wondered if he could sneak Sidney into some lake without anybody noticing. 

“Really want to stay penguin, Sid? Is fine right now, but they are not going to let you play hockey with wings. Just ask Carter.”

Sidney didn't react and Geno suddenly felt cold. 

“No more hockey, Sid,” he pressed the matter. “No proper off-season training, no next season, no third Cup.” The only thing Sidney did was diving down again and bumping against the tub. Geno wondered if this was Sidney ignoring his weak attempts to convince him to change back or if the curse was turning Sidney non-responsive. 

“Won't be able to take you to Russia with me,” Geno mumbled, more to himself.

And then there was suddenly a full-grown naked hockey play in the tub, dripping wet and staring at Geno with wide eyes.

“Take me to Russia with you?” Sidney blurted out. Mouth slightly gasping open Geno stared at Sidney. 

Then he stood up and walked towards the door.

“Wait, Geno …. I can explain... damn it!” He heard Sidney behind him, trying to scramble out of the tub, slipping, judging by the muffled curses that followed Geno out of the bathroom and then the bedroom.

Geno had almost made it to the top of the stairs when he remembered that his shirt was still lying on the bathroom floor.

For a moment he debated just leaving without it. Get home, calm down and have Sidney explain what the hell he'd been pulling here later.

But then reason and fear of ending up on Twitter while driving through Pittsburgh half-naked took over and he turned around and stomped back into Sidney's bedroom.

Sidney had in the meanwhile managed to escape his bathtub and was now standing in the middle of his bedroom, still naked and dripping on the floor.

He startled when Geno came back in, looking so pathetic that Geno's feet stopped themselves halfway to the bathroom and his shirt.

Crossing his hands Geno stared at Sidney who faltered under his look.

“Explain,” he then said. Or snapped actually. Sidney flinched a bit and looked at the floor.

“'m sorry I didn't turn back earlier,” he mumbled. Geno nodded slowly. Good start but there better also be a good explanation. 

Sidney had two speeds when it came to his shifts. Slow when he had just calmed down enough to be a human again. And sudden and abrupt those few times he was actually in full control of his abilities. 

“Lied when I asked if you could change back on your own?” Geno asked.

Sidney actually winced and continued staring at his feet. 

“Was worried you know. Thought somebody put Cup-curse on you.” Part of him didn't want Sidney to feel more guilty. The other part had been worried about his captain.

“I didn't lie, I really got stuck when you asked. It … it got better though after the nap. Thanks for the fish by the way,” he half-smiled at Geno who only raised an eyebrow. Sidney's smile faltered.

“I know, I know, this is not a good coping mechanism, someday I might get stuck for longer and...”

“Why you even shift in the first place?” Geno interrupted Sidney. There was a point to what Sidney was saying but Geno could also admit that his own abilities which were basically eliminated by wearing a pair of gloves where probably a lot easier to deal with than Sidney's. 

Sidney, if possible, looked even more guilty and sheepish.

“I, uh, I kinda misunderstood something you wrote?” he said.

He nodded towards his pile of clothes, his phone lying on top of it.

“Oh Sid,” Geno sighed when he realized what Sidney was talking about. 

_Thinking about going back to Russia soon, what you're saying?_ he had written to Sidney. He had thought that was clear enough. Sidney seemingly thought less so. 

“Was hinting that we should go to Russia together. Or vacation. Somewhere together. You know talking about it.” he stressed the talking part.

“Eh, yes, I realize that now too,” Sidney mumbled. His face was flushed. Geno tried his best to keep his eyes on his face even though he was wondering how far that flush went. Then Sidney squared his shoulders.

“I'm really sorry I made you think I was cursed or stuck and that I didn't shift back when I had, you know, calmed down.” Sidney said. “And I understand if you need some time alone to...”

“Oh, Sid,” Geno said and crossed the few feet separating the two and then slowly lifted his hand to Sidney's cheek.

Sidney looked at him surprised but didn't move away. Geno touched his check with two fingers, stroking it softly.

 _Is okay,_ he thought, his own thoughts echoing slightly in Sidney's mind . _Forgive you. Just no lying the next time, okay?_

 _Okay. No lying. Promised_ Geno heard Sidney's answer in his own head, followed by a slight smile.

“And talking before shifting next time too, okay?” Geno then added, outside of their linked minds this time though.

Suddenly remembering that Sidney was still naked with them standing only a few inches apart and that while Geno could mostly control just which of his thoughts exactly to share there still was limit to his self-control, he quickly stepped away.

Sidney, maybe having caught something of that before Geno had stopped touching him, looked down at himself.

“Probably should get some clothes then,” he said.

Geno nodded. 

“I'll … I'll wait downstairs. Can talk them,” he said. He turned towards the door. 

“Hey Geno,” Sidney made him stop. “We're good right? I mean,” Sidney looked down at his feet, blushing slightly and Geno's glance followed unwilling and oh, the flush really did go all the way. “You still want me to go to Russia with you?”

“Yes, naturally,” Geno answered without even thinking. “Owe me lunch though,” he paused for a moment, remembering that he had almost called Kessel and had to explain why their captain was a penguin. “And dinner,” hen then added. “And breakfast. With more bacon. Maybe more lunch then too.”

Sidney laughed and Geno felt a smile blooming on his face too. Admittedly there were a lot better ways of dealing with stress than Sidney's preferred way of coping. 

But at least this time, it had turned out well enough.

**Author's Note:**

> "Research" for this consisted of watching YouTube videos of penguins. It was good research.


End file.
